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Jul 30 2017

Formula One 2017: Hungaroring

The best news- this is the last race before the summer break and we’re going to take 3 or 4 weeks (I could look it up but I’m too damn lazy) off. Formula One is serious about this, you can’t even send email and I have 3 words for them- “Team Orders” and “Radio”. They have never been able to enforce any rules about either one and this is no different.

I’ll add for you Computer Racers the Ryzen Threadripper, a supercomputer for your desktop. For a mere $5K or so (including chip, motherboard, graphics, 1 Terabyte of RAM and as many SSDs as you care to throw at 16 cores and 32 threads of 64 lane Gen 3.0 PCIe goodness) I’d send every engineer home with one (falls in the rounds), all the data we’d collected so far this year, and tell them to shut up (Moscow Rules) and come back with a plan.

Anyone sporting a tan except the talent is fired.

But it works perfectly with my agenda since I’ll be traveling and have appointments (if you ever find the content sucks more than usual it’s probably one of those and were it any of your business I’d write about it). September will likely be even worse and October/November will mark a transfer to Stars Hollow North Lake (where you have to pump the holding tank) or Stars Hollow By The Sea (which has no shower). Fortunately for you we don’t post in Smell-o-Vision.

Hey, the Europeans tolerated it for a thousand years though it was a primary cause of the French Revolution.

Notre révolution m’a fait sentir tout le sens de l’axiome qui dit que l’histoire est un roman ; et je suis convaincu que la fortune et l’intrigue ont fait plus de héros, que le génie et la vertu. (Robspierre, 21 December 1792)

Speaking of chance and intrigue, the Halo system (which don’t work, the center pillar obstructs vision and it’s totally useless against the Massa springs and Bianchi stuffs it’s advertised to protect against) is going to be mandatory next year.

Jules Bianchi drove his whole car under a crane Seven Ups style. You don’t walk away from that unless you’re Roy Scheider.

You fix that by firing Crane Operators, Safety Crew Workers, and Track Control Officials because it’s a system failure, not a car failure. Yeah, I wish he was still alive too.

Bits of debris (admittedly a big bit) like Massa picked up the open Halo framework doesn’t even attempt to solve, just like it can’t do anything about the inner ear infection that will keep him from starting today. I’m as pro safety as the next guy, maybe more, but this is simply stupid. Like all truly bad ideas (neoliberalism) they’re looking to propagate it so it seems fashionable and inevitable.

Sauber is staying with Ferrari engines instead of moving to Honda which is probably a wise move given Honda shows no signs of improvement. On the other hand they will be getting ‘B’ equipment, you can’t fool me Maranello.

In other news from North Italy is that Scuderia Marlboro is looking racy, they’ve taken the first row in Qualifying. It’s not that I’m a Hamilton fan but I actively dislike them and Red Bull (McLaren, Williams, Sauber, Lotus/Renault I like) and Vettel is objectively the biggest asshole on the circuit now that Rosberg is gone (you might have had an argument about Rosberg though I would have still picked Vettel). Anyway it’s significant in that Hamilton starts a mere point behind in the Drivers’ Championship. I hope for a DNF from a gentle electrical failure at the far side of the track so Vettel has a long walk.

On offer are Super Soft, Soft, and Medium. Hungaroring is a tight track and while you might try a one stop I would think two (Super Soft, Soft, Super Soft) will be the strategy most teams will pursue.

The bad news- I’ve had nothing but trouble with my formula1.com subscription this year and it is beyond doubt my cookie will time out and I’ll have to re-login which is entirely painful. It sucks to be me and I demand all of your false sympathy for my plight. I bought a case of the world’s tiniest violins on Amazon and I invite you to take one, on the house.

My tiny trombone collection is stuck somewhere between here and China so you’ll have to wait to make whaa-whaa-whaa-whaa noises.

48 comments

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  1. ek hornbeck

    Vent Hole

  2. ek hornbeck

    Formation Lap

  3. ek hornbeck

    Track Hot

  4. ek hornbeck

    Oops, Recon

  5. ek hornbeck

    Now Formation Lap

  6. ek hornbeck

    We race

  7. ek hornbeck

    Verstappen whaps Ricciardo. Ricciardo Done. Team mates.

  8. ek hornbeck

    Red Bull

  9. ek hornbeck

    Safety Car of Course. Clearly Verstappen.

  10. ek hornbeck

    Wehrlein takes the opportunity to pit

  11. ek hornbeck

    Verstappen was like 1 penalty away from a 1 race suspension.

  12. ek hornbeck

    Hulkenberg also hit Grosjean

  13. ek hornbeck

    Safety In

  14. ek hornbeck

    Lap 5 of 70

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Bottas
    Verstappen
    Hamilton
    Sainz
    Alonso
    Perez
    Vandoorne
    Ocon

  15. ek hornbeck

    Verstappen 10 second Time penalty.

  16. ek hornbeck

    Lap 10 of 70

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Bottas
    Verstappen
    Hamilton
    Sainz
    Alonso
    Perez
    Vandoorne
    Ocon

  17. ek hornbeck

    Lap 15 of 70

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Bottas
    Verstappen
    Hamilton
    Sainz
    Alonso
    Perez
    Vandoorne
    Ocon

  18. ek hornbeck

    Lap 20 of 70

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Bottas
    Verstappen
    Hamilton
    Sainz
    Alonso
    Perez
    Vandoorne
    Ocon

  19. ek hornbeck

    Grosjean pits

  20. ek hornbeck

    Grosjean back in. Bad pit.

  21. ek hornbeck

    Oops, didn’t make it. Grosjean stops. Crossthreaded wheel nut.

  22. ek hornbeck

    Lap 25 of 70

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Bottas
    Verstappen
    Hamilton
    Sainz
    Alonso
    Perez
    Vandoorne
    Ocon

  23. ek hornbeck

    Bottas pits

  24. ek hornbeck

    Lap 30 of 70

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Verstappen
    Hamilton
    Bottas
    Sainz
    Alonso
    Perez
    Vandoorne

  25. ek hornbeck

    Hamilton pits

  26. ek hornbeck

    Vettel pits

  27. ek hornbeck

    Raikkonen pits

  28. ek hornbeck

    Perez pits

  29. ek hornbeck

    Di Resta pits

  30. ek hornbeck

    Lap 35 of 70

    Verstappen
    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Bottas
    Hamilton
    Vandoorne
    Hulkenberg
    Palmer
    Sainz
    Alonso

  31. ek hornbeck

    Alonso and Ocon pitted

  32. ek hornbeck

    Lap 40 of 70

    Verstappen
    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Bottas
    Hamilton
    Vandoorne
    Hulkenberg
    Palmer
    Alonso
    Sainz

  33. ek hornbeck

    Kvyat pits

  34. ek hornbeck

    Verstappen finally pits on lap 42

  35. ek hornbeck

    Vandoorne pits

  36. ek hornbeck

    Lap 45 of 70

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Hamilton
    Bottas
    Verstappen
    Hulkenberg
    Alonso
    Sainz
    Perez
    Palmer
    Ocon

  37. ek hornbeck

    Hulkenberg pits

  38. ek hornbeck

    Hamilton passes Bottas, waiting for Vettel to fail.

  39. ek hornbeck

    Palmer pits

  40. ek hornbeck

    Lap 50 of 70

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Hamilton
    Bottas
    Verstappen
    Alonso
    Sainz
    Perez
    Ocon
    Vandoorne

  41. ek hornbeck

    Lap 55 of 70

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Hamilton
    Bottas
    Verstappen
    Alonso
    Sainz
    Perez
    Ocon
    Vandoorne

  42. ek hornbeck

    Lap 60 of 70

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Hamilton
    Bottas
    Verstappen
    Alonso
    Sainz
    Perez
    Ocon
    Vandoorne

  43. ek hornbeck

    Di Resta stops

  44. ek hornbeck

    Lap 65 of 70

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Hamilton
    Bottas
    Verstappen
    Alonso
    Sainz
    Perez
    Ocon
    Vandoorne

  45. ek hornbeck

    This is much more exciting than it reads. Mercedes has been bringing it to Vettel and Raikkonen the whole race.

  46. ek hornbeck

    Hulkenberg pits again

  47. ek hornbeck

    Hulkenberg stopped

  48. ek hornbeck

    Final

    Vettel
    Raikkonen
    Bottas
    Hamilton
    Verstappen
    Alonso
    Sainz
    Perez
    Ocon
    Vandoorne

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