2017 Playoffs: Junior League Wild Card (Twins at Yankees)

Damn Yankees. Did you know they started off as the Baltimore Orioles?

As the most recent (2 years ago) YouTube comment points out, this song and dance is supposed to be ironic. Lola is a demon. On the other hand it is highly appropriate considering this musical is about both teams. On paper the Twins (formerly the first in war, first in peace, last in the Junior League Washington Senators) shouldn’t have a chance. They’ve only won 2 of 14 post-season games against the Yankees. Ah, but that’s why you play the game.

Here in Stars Hollow we have mixed feelings. My activist brother still sports the hat I picked up for him at the airport (I’m such a thoughtful guy) while I was rushing out of Minneapolis a step ahead of the trolls at Netroots Nation one year. Emily on the other hand is pinstripes through and through (I’ve tried to cure her). TMC at World Headquarters is a Bombers fan as you might expect of someone who works in the shadow of the Empire State Building. My Metropolitans have disappointed yet again but hey, at least I’ll not have to pack an extra hat for my trip to Stars Hollow By The Sea and Stars Hollow North Lake.

Unlike some of my Blue and Orange ilk I don’t actively despise the Yanks, New York is a big city and has plenty of room for 2 or 3 clubs. I just don’t follow them so this is the first time I’ll see the team all year.

The Twins will send Ervin Santana (R, 16 – 8, 3.28 ERA) up against Luis Severino (R, 14 – 6, 2.98 ERA). The last time Santana faced the Yankees in the playoffs was in 2005 when he came in as a reliever to help the Angels win the Division. Severino has never played in the post-season but at least he’s not C.C. Sabathia, the biggest waste of money that’s ever played for the Yankees (and that’s saying a lot). Junior League rules so plenty of room on the bench for aging and ineffectual former stars.

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  1. Vent Hole

  2. Time to take a knee for the racist anthem.

  3. First pitch Strike

  4. Lead off HR. Twins 1 – 0.

  5. Foul out on the tarp

  6. Base hit.

  7. 2 Run HR. Twins 3 – 0.

  8. Another Base Hit.

  9. Double. 2nd and 3rd. 1 Out. New Pitcher.

  10. 2 KOs. Bottom 1st.

  11. Leadoff Walk.

  12. Single. Corners.

  13. Foul tip out

  14. 3 Run HR. Tied 3 – 3.

  15. Fly Out. 2 Down.

  16. Top 2nd

  17. 2 KOs

  18. Bottom 2nd

  19. Solo Shot. 4 – 3 Yankees.

  20. Top 3rd. Single. Walk. Pop Out. Walk. Bases Loaded. Pitching Change. RBI Fielder’s Choice. Twins 4 – 3. Stolen Base. KO. Bottom 3rd.

  21. Leadoff Double. RBI Single. Top 4th.

  22. Oops. 4 – 5 Yankees.

  23. Bottom 4th

  24. 2 RBI HR. Yankees 7 – 4.

  25. Top 5th

  26. Bottom 5th

  27. Well, stretch. Nothing much has changed.

  28. Bottom 7th. Walked in a run. Yankees 8 – 4. 2 Out.

  29. Top 8th. He didn’t touch the base. Out.

  30. Damn Yankees

  31. Done. 8 – 4 Yankees. Whatever Lola wants.

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