«

»

Dec 21 2017

I Need A Little ek’smas

Right this very minute.

Je suis Patrick Dennis though I like to pride myself Gloria Upson can’t distract me by swishing her hips like a matador (What were you thinking Patrick? Wait, I know.).

Well, sometimes you just need to woman up.

Oh come all ye faithful, joyful and triumphant

Only, you can’t. Bethlehem and Nazareth are closed because they’re Palistinian Territory and have been for over 1400 years, just like Jerusalem. The United States got its ass kicked in the United Nations Security Council 14 – 1 (so much winning) and is likely today to gain an equally favorable result (191 – 2, we add Israel!) in the General Assembly.

And why are we doing this? Precisely because it brings the end of the entire World closer when righteous Christians (How do you you know you’re righteous? God has blessed you with wealth.) are Raptured directly into Heaven and don’t have to endure the struggle of the End Days.

Hey, at least we get all their stuff.

Merry ek’smas.