Feb 05 2021

Cartnoon

Mobbed by Raccoons (25)

It was snowing with freezing temperatures and the raccoons were super hungry and knew they had to stock up for the long winter

TMC for ek hornbeck

Feb 05 2021

The Breakfast Club (Diminish Fear)

Welcome to The Breakfast Club! We’re a disorganized group of rebel lefties who hang out and chat if and when we’re not too hungover we’ve been bailed out we’re not too exhausted from last night’s (CENSORED) the caffeine kicks in. Join us every weekday morning at 9am (ET) and weekend morning at 10:00am (ET) (or whenever we get around to it) to talk about current news and our boring lives and to make fun of LaEscapee! If we are ever running late, it’s PhilJD’s fault.

This Day in History

FDR plans to ‘pack’ the Supreme Court; Byron de la Beckwith convicted of killing civil rights leader Medgar Evers; The Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour premieres; William S. Burroughs and Hank Aaron born.

Breakfast Tunes

Something to Think about over Coffee Prozac

I have learned over the years that when one’s mind is made up, this diminishes fear; knowing what must be done does away with fear.

Rosa Parks

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Feb 04 2021

Late Night Today

Late Night Today is for our readers who can’t stay awake to watch the shows. Everyone deserves a good laugh.

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert

Marjorie Taylor Greene’s Conspiracy Theories, In Song

A helpful tune for any members of Congress who need a reminder…

My Pillow Guy Spouts The Same Election Fraud Lies The Ex-President Plans To Use At Impeachment TrialThe disgraced former president’s legal filing indicates he plans to repeat his lies about election fraud at trial, the same lies that My Pillow founder Mike Lindell keeps spouting in interviews even after being sued by Dominion Voting Systems.

Harriet Tubman Will Finally Become The Face Of America’s $20 Bill

As part of his effort to right the wrongs of his predecessor, President Biden has revived the effort to replace Andrew Jackson with American hero Harriet Tubman on the $20 bill. Here to comment is Late Show writer John Thibodeaux

The Daily Show with Trevor Noah

Jeff Bezos Steps Down & Amazon Steals from Delivery Drivers

Jeff Bezos steps down as Amazon CEO, and Amazon settles in court for stealing tips from delivery drivers.

America’s Childcare Crisis – If You Don’t Know, Now You Know

Why is America facing a childcare crisis during the pandemic? Here’s a look at the long-term economic impact of childcare costs, how the U.S. stacks up against other countries and the one time in history the government subsidized day care.

House Dems Crack Down on Guns & Newsmax Cracks Down on Mr. Pillow

The House of Representatives will start fining lawmakers who refuse to walk through metal detectors, and Dominion scares Newsmax into shutting down Mike Lindell on air.

Late Night with Seth Meyers

GOP Stands by Marjorie Taylor Greene; My Pillow Guy’s Newsmax Meltdown: A Closer Look

Seth takes a closer look at Republicans making it clear they’re willing to excuse the behavior of Donald Trump and Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene.

Jimmy Kimmel Live

Eric Trump Defends Daddy, Lindsey Graham Defends Q-Anut & VERY Conflicted Tom Brady Fan

Finding a place to get vaccinated is still a struggle, people who smoke are getting priority over non-smokers, Dr. Fauci says that 70-85% of the population needs to be vaccinated before a return to normalcy, the World Health Organization is currently brainstorming names for new variants of the virus, Canada issued a formal apology to China over a t-shirt, Hitler’s toilet is now available to the highest bidder, Eric Trump went on Hannity last night to pop off about the “unequal justice” that his family has endured, Lindsey Graham tried to explain the words of Q-Anut congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene, Golden Globe nominations were announced, players for the Kansas City Chiefs were about to get haircuts when they found out their barber tested positive for COVID, and in honor of Tom Brady’s trip to the Super Bowl we check in with our favorite New England Patriots fan who has some mixed emotions about the whole thing.

The Late Late Show with James Corden

Hell Breaks Loose When James Says The SECRET WORD

This is exactly like they played it on “Pee-wee’s Playhouse.”

Biden Is Done with Bad Policy

James Corden kicks off the show looking at the headlines, including President Joe Biden continuing a run of executive orders to “eliminate bad policy.” And James is excited to learn Guillermo owns a small swim spa at home before checking with the staff and crew to see who has tattoos or piercings

Feb 04 2021

Cartnoon

Full Frontal with Samantha Bee

The Stonk Market: 2008 All Over Again

GameStop, Reddit, and hedge funds, oh my! It’s the upper middle class vs. the rich and we just can’t wait to see who wins this class war! Maybe it’ll be ordinary Americans if the SEC can actually start regulating the market?

TMC for ek hornbeck

Feb 04 2021

The Breakfast Club (Just One Thing)

Welcome to The Breakfast Club! We’re a disorganized group of rebel lefties who hang out and chat if and when we’re not too hungover we’ve been bailed out we’re not too exhausted from last night’s (CENSORED) the caffeine kicks in. Join us every weekday morning at 9am (ET) and weekend morning at 10:00am (ET) (or whenever we get around to it) to talk about current news and our boring lives and to make fun of LaEscapee! If we are ever running late, it’s PhilJD’s fault.

This Day in History

World War II’s Yalta Conference; O.J. Simpson found liable for the murders of his ex-wife and her friend; Patty Hearst kidnapped; the Massachusetts gay marriage ruling; aviator Charles Lindbergh born.

Breakfast Tunes

Something to Think about over Coffee Prozac

You cannot define a person on just one thing. You can’t just forget all these wonderful and good things that a person has done because one thing didn’t come off the way you thought it should come off.

Aretha Franklin

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Feb 03 2021

Late Night Today

Late Night Today is for our readers who can’t stay awake to watch the shows. Everyone deserves a good laugh.

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert

Coronavirus Kenny May Decide When You Get Your Covid Vaccine

At this point in the pandemic, Coronavirus Kenny is telling us what we absolutely DON’T need to hear.

The GOP Is Consumed By Its Own Conspiracy Theories As Establishment Republicans Jump Ship

If crazy conspiracy theories are a cancer on the Republican Party, people like Mitch McConnell and Karl Rove have spent the last 20 years selling cigarettes to their base.

Quarantinewhile… Dueling GameStop Movies Will Compete To Tell The Story Of Wall Street’s Wild Ride

Quarantinewhile… It’s been less than a week since Reddit traders took Wall Street hedge funds for a ride on GameStop shares, and already two films about the stock market drama are being rushed into production.

The Daily Show with Trevor Noah

AOC Reveals What Happened to Her During the Capitol Riot | The Daily Social Distancing Show

Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez goes on Instagram Live to share her account of the attack on the Capitol.

Australia Goes Back Into Lockdown & Pilots Forget How to Fly

Scientists teach spinach how to email, the first COVID case in 10 months sends Western Australia into lockdown, and fewer travelers means pilots may need to brush up on their flying skills.

What Will the New Coronavirus Relief Package Look Like?

Democrats and Republicans are $1.3 trillion apart on corona relief as President Biden pledges bipartisanship.

Here’s How Wall Street Has Always Manipulated the Markets

Day traders took down a massive hedge fund by artificially inflating GameStop stock, and now, Wall Street is whining about it. But Wall Street manipulating the market is nothing new.

Late Night with Seth Meyers

Hey! Groundhog Day 2021

Seth has some strong words for the unnecessary annual tradition of Groundhog Day.

McConnell Says Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene’s “Loony Lies” Are “Cancer” to GOP

Jimmy Kimmel Live

Klan Mom, MyPillow Mike & Courtside Karen Keeping America Great!

Snow is on the ground almost everywhere, Punxsutawney Phil declared six more weeks of winter, Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene leaned into fundraising after Mitch McConnell and a few other GOP senators emerged to distance themselves from her, the MyPillow Twitter account is now banned after Mike Lindell tried to fire tweets off from it, Donald Trump’s new lawyers released their response to the impeachment charges with a major spelling error, Jared and Ivanka reported a combined 2020 income of somewhere between $23 and $121 million, Jeff Bezos announced that he will be stepping down as CEO of Amazon, LeBron James got into it with an Atlanta Hawks fan and dubbed her “Courtside Karen,” and once again we turn to a pair of prognosticating pugs named Ella & Petunia to continue their amazing five year winning streak of predicting the winner of the Super Bowl.

The Late Late Show with James Corden

What’s With the Grape on James’s Desk?

James Corden is surprised to find a single grape on his desk and learns it was left behind by executive producer Ben Winston, who isn’t interested in sharing details.

James Corden Has a Job Waiting for Jeff Bezos

James Corden kicks off the show with a big question: what is the actual hype with Groundhog Day. After, he looks at the headlines, including President Joe Biden considering cutting Donald Trump off from receiving post-presidential intelligence briefings. And with Jeff Bezos announcing he will be stepping down as Amazon CEO, James thinks Jeff could bring some value to the show.

Feb 03 2021

Cartnoon

Got caught up in digging out from two feet of snow, so, while we are all recuperating from shoveling white stuff, this is the Late Night Today from Monday night.

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert

A Winter Storm Tests The Survival Skills Of NYC Reporters

When you’re a reporter in The Big Apple, sometimes you have to get a little creative in the winter months.

The Blizzard Monologue: Biden Plays Hardball On Covid Relief, Q Believers Struggle To Move On

Our brave host Stephen Colbert slept in his office at the Ed Sullivan Theater last night so that nothing, not even a massive blizzard battering New York City with wind and snow, could keep him from delivering his monologue.

Party Safe On Super Bowl Sunday With These Tips From The CDC

Sure, the pandemic has put a damper on party plans this year, but the folks at the CDC don’t want it to stop you from having a good time on Sunday! Don’t miss Stephen Colbert’s special “A Late Show: Super Bowl Edition” this Sunday on CBS and CBS All Access!

The Daily Show with Trevor Noah

Collapsing Freeways, Anti-Vax Protests & A Military Coup

A chunk of California’s Highway 1 collapses, anti-vaxxers shut down a vaccination site at Dodgers Stadium, and Myanmar’s military seizes control.

Late Night with Seth Meyers

Republicans Demand “Bipartisanship” from Biden on COVID-19 Relief Bill: A Closer Look

eth takes a closer look at President Biden agreeing to meet with GOP senators after Republicans whined about the supposed lack of bipartisanship in his response to the COVID-19 crisis.

Jimmy Kimmel Live

COVID Vaccine Protests, Desperate Biden Conspiracies & Impeachment Round 2

Many Americans are hunkered down under a thick blanket of snow, protesters blocked the entrance of Dodgers Stadium delaying vaccinations, OJ Simpson got his vaccine, the Biden Administration is teaming up with private enterprise to get the vaccine into every person in America, Coachella is cancelled for the second year in a row, millions of people are watching videos of other people cleaning, Joe Biden is planning to keep the Space Force, conspiracy theorists believe Biden put a bust of Hugo Chavez in the Oval Office (wrong guy), Fox News is looking for something to criticize Joe Biden about, we gear up for impeachment trial #2, Anderson Cooper gets a bizarre apology from a former Q supporter, Bachelor Matt finally sees that “Queen Victoria” is a monster, and we replace the voices of the contestants on The Bachelor with the voices of who they’re really behaving like – children.

The Late Late Show with James Corden

Anyone Know Where Trump Can Find a Lawyer?

James Corden kicks off the show with a special happy birthday message for his friend Harry Styles, complete with some prime HS puns. After, James recaps the latest headlines including Donald Trump losing five lawyers representing him in his second impeachment trial and an update on the QAnon Shaman infamous for wearing horns during the invasion of the U.S. Capitol building. And after he gets a phone call, James admits his Joe Biden impression needs some work.

TMC for ek hornbeck

Feb 03 2021

The Breakfast Club (Two Choices)

Welcome to The Breakfast Club! We’re a disorganized group of rebel lefties who hang out and chat if and when we’re not too hungover we’ve been bailed out we’re not too exhausted from last night’s (CENSORED) the caffeine kicks in. Join us every weekday morning at 9am (ET) and weekend morning at 10:00am (ET) (or whenever we get around to it) to talk about current news and our boring lives and to make fun of LaEscapee! If we are ever running late, it’s PhilJD’s fault.

This Day in History

The ‘day the music died’ during early rock ‘n roll; the Luna 9 probe lands on the Moon; the first woman to pilot a Space Shuttle; painter Norman Rockwell and composer Felix Mendelssohn born.

Breakfast Tunes

Something to Think about over Coffee Prozac

You always have two choices: your commitment versus your fear.

Sammy Davis, Jr.

Read the rest of this entry »

Feb 02 2021

Fool Me Once

In 2009, when the new Obama administration decided to make heath care reform its first goal, President Obama was under the misguided notion that he could work with Republicans. Not that he wasn’t warned. Then Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY) and his gang of obstructionists made it very clear the day after Obama won the election that they would block all of Obama’s agenda. Under the guidance of Obama’s Chief of Staff, Rahm Emanuel, the White House and the Democratic controlled congress worked for months to hammer out. The final bill was a complicated mess, thousands of pages long that feel far short of what the majority of Americans wanted, a public option, Medicare by in or Medicare for all. It did have 200 Republican amendments. In the end not one Republican voted for the Affordable Care Act because the bill was too long and it had to be passed under reconciliation. That is when the Senate Democrats under the misguided leadership of Majority leader Harry Reid (D-NV) should have ended the filibuster.

Now, here we are 12 years later still dithering with an even more obstinate Republican Party over the CoVid-19 recue bill. Though it does sound like Biden and the Democrats have finally awoken.

The problem with the Republicans’ ‘offer’ on a COVID relief package

By Steve Benen, The Maddow Blog

Republicans apparently expect people to believe legislation should be assessed, not on its merits, but in its capacity to make the GOP minority happy.

s Democratic officials move forward with an ambitious COVID relief package, Senate Republicans have focused on two principal concerns. The first is that it would hurt their feelings if the Democratic majority passed a bill without them — a complaint that no one should take seriously for all sorts of reasons.

But the second GOP talking point is that the existing proposal, presented weeks ago by President Joe Biden’s White House, would do too much to help the economy and struggling Americans. What kind of proposal do Republicans have in mind? Over the weekend, their vision came into sharper focus.

The Republicans’ proposed package is much smaller than Biden’s $1.9 trillion proposal, and includes $160 billion for vaccines, $4 billion for health and substance abuse services, the continuation of current unemployment aid and unspecified “targeted” economic assistance and help for schools.

All told, the GOP blueprint would carry a roughly $600 billion price tag, which is less than a third of what the White House has said is necessary to deliver meaningful economic results. That said, the Republicans’ proposal, presented to the White House in a written letter issued on Saturday, was signed by 10 GOP senators, which is a notable number: to overcome a Republican filibuster, a proposal would need at least 10 members of the Senate minority to vote for it. Sen. Susan Collins (R-Maine), who’s helped spearhead this effort, has apparently lined up the 10 votes.

Alternatively, of course, Democrats could simply take advantage of the budget reconciliation process, pass their own bill, and move on to the next policy priority.

But Republicans hope to prevent such an outcome with their counter-offer that’s difficult to take seriously. As a Washington Post analysis noted, this GOP contingent effectively took Biden’s plan, scrapped aid to state and cities, eliminated the minimum wage increase, slashed the value of direct-aid checks, limited the number of middle-class households that could receive direct-aid checks, and cut supplemental unemployment benefits.

And why in the world would Democrats scrap their superior bill, on purpose, which they can pass on their own, to instead embrace a meager Republican alternative? Because, some GOP senators said yesterday, it would signify “bipartisanship” and “unity.”

The game is insulting in its inanity: Republicans apparently expect people to believe legislation should be assessed, not on its merits, but in its capacity to make the GOP minority happy. Biden can sign a good bill or a bipartisan one, and Republicans want the new president to prioritize the latter over the former.

After Republican West Virginia Governor Jim Justice backed a “go-big” relief bill, conservative Democratic Senator Joe Manchin, who had been refusing to beck a bill that wasn’t bipartisan, had a change of heart announcing that he would back the $1.9 trillion relief bill

Feb 02 2021

Groundhog Day

Posted by ek hornbeck on February 2, 2019. Re-posted by TMC for ek.

What would you do if you were stuck in one place and every day was exactly the same, and nothing that you did mattered?

That about sums it up for me.

Ned? Ned Ryerson?!

Don’t Drive Angry!

You like boats, but not the ocean. You go to a lake in summer with your family up in the mountains. There’s a long wooden dock and a boathouse with boards missing from the roof, and a place you used to crawl underneath to be alone. You’re a sucker for French poetry and rhinestones. You’re very generous. You’re kind to strangers and children, and when you stand in the snow you look like an angel.

How are you doing this?

I told you. I wake up every day, right here, right in Punxsutawney, and it’s always February 2nd, and there’s nothing I can do about it.

How appropriate

I’ll tell you 2 things- You have to keep doing it until you get it right and if in the First Act you introduce a Gun, by the Third Act you have to use it.

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