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Apr 07 2020

Essential Workers

Parents and other people with replacement humans in their lives (fortunately not me since I’ve no place for the leftovers) may rejoice as Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern of New Zealand has declared the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny ‘Essential Workers’.

Easter Bunny and tooth fairy are ‘essential workers,’ New Zealand prime minister says
by N’dea Yancey-Bragg, USA Today
April 6, 2020

Essential workers include doctors, nurses, grocery store clerks, ride-share drivers and police officers – and in New Zealand, the list just got longer. Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern was asked at a news briefing whether she had considered an exemption for the Easter Bunny, and Ardern confirmed she had.

“You will be pleased to know that we do consider both the tooth fairy and the Easter Bunny to be essential workers,” Ardern said.

She noted that it may be more difficult for them to visit every home this year because they may be “potentially quite busy at home with their family.”

“So I say to the children of New Zealand, if the Easter Bunny doesn’t make it to your household, we have to understand that it’s a bit difficult at the moment for the bunny to perhaps be everywhere,” she continued.

Well I would hope so. For one thing the Tooth Fairy is a Fairy and even if she got sick we could clap her back to life like a Light Bulb (Clap On, Clap Off- too soon?).

And the Easter Bunny is, well, a Bunny. If he were a Tiger I suppose I would have to worry and that would be a really freaky childhood memory (A ferocious Tiger giving you candy? Why? To fatten you up?) that would require thousands of hours of very expensive Therapy to unpack. I can fit you in twice a week.

I can’t find in the article where they they discuss Santa Claus. Hopefully it won’t be an issue when the time comes. He’s a right jolly Old Elf so… not human, probably ok.

So how is New Zealand doing? 1,106 cases with one death so far. They also were very early with a very strict border control policy and quarantine and it ain’t a big place. If the Sheep don’t get it they’ll probably be alright.

And Jacinda was still shaking hands and hugging people March 17th. So was I except that’s something I never do because I’m not sociable and fit to be around.