Tag: sausage grinder of snark

The Daily/Nightly Show (Penultimate)

Discontinuity

A Giant Barbecue

I like the brisket with Carolina sauce, but what do I know?

It’s cruise week.

This week’s guests-

Who knows what madness Ted will spout but he desparately needs to pump up his polls before next week’s Republican debate and The Donald has no monopoly on crazy.

The Church of Scientology says that a human is an immortal, spiritual being (thetan) that is resident in a physical body. The thetan has had innumerable past lives and it is observed in advanced Scientology texts that lives preceding the thetan’s arrival on Earth were lived in extraterrestrial cultures.

See?

But there are no Black people in Maine

You just don’t hang with the right people.

Maine is the Arkansas of the northeast and basically everyone who doesn’t live in the touristy areas is dirt poor and doesn’t have all the teeth they were born with.  The rest steal everything they can from the ‘aways’ who stare and take pictures of rocks, water, and trees WHICH WE HAVE MORE OF THAN YOU, YOU NEW HAMPSHIRE BASTARDS!

Yeah, come February and I’ll tell you what upstate New York, New Hampshire and Maine are all about.  Cold and dark, on the positive side there aren’t as many bugs.

Me, I live in the armpit of New England where we hide the stinky and smelly by products of the Industrial Revolution with a thin screen of trees because we have class.

Tonightly the topic is more Cosby.  The panel is Colin Quinn, Sally Kohn, and Gina Yashere.

Ta-Nehisi Coates’ 2 part web exclusive extended interview and the real news below.

The Daily/Nightly Show (‘Burbs)

Discontinuity

Why do Greeks make the best Pizza?

Next week’s guests-

Ta-Nehisi Coates will be on to talk about Between the World and Me.

Between the World and Me” (which takes its title from a Richard Wright poem) offers an abbreviated portrait of the author’s life at home, focusing mainly on the fear he felt growing up. Fear of the police, who he tells his son “have been endowed with the authority to destroy your body,” and who also possess a dominion of prerogatives that include “friskings, detainings, beatings, and humiliations.” And fear of the streets where members of crews – “young men who’d transmuted their fear into rage” – might “break your jaw, stomp your face, and shoot you down to feel that power, to revel in the might of their own bodies,” where death might “billow up like fog” on an ordinary afternoon.

The “need to be always on guard” was exhausting, “the slow siphoning of essence,” Mr. Coates writes. He “feared not just the violence of this world but the rules designed to protect you from it, the rules that would have you contort your body to address the block, and contort again to be taken seriously by colleagues, and contort again so as not to give police a reason.”

Mr. Coates – a national correspondent for The Atlantic – contrasts this world of the streets with the “other world” of suburbia, “organized around pot roasts, blueberry pies, fireworks, ice cream sundaes, immaculate bathrooms, and small toy trucks that were loosed in wooded backyards with streams and glens.” He associates this clichéd suburban idyll with what he calls “the Dream” – not the American dream of opportunity and a better life for one’s children; not Martin Luther King Jr.’s dream of freedom and equality (which the Reverend King observed was “a dream deeply rooted in the American dream”), but instead, in Mr. Coates’s somewhat confusing use of the term, an exclusionary white dream rooted in a history of subjugation and privilege.

Those Dreamers, he contends, “have forgotten the scale of theft that enriched them in slavery; the terror that allowed them, for a century, to pilfer the vote; the segregationist policy that gave them their suburbs. They have forgotten, because to remember would tumble them out of the beautiful Dream and force them to live down here with us, down here in the world.”

Yeah Ta, I was raised in the world and it ain’t all “pot roasts, blueberry pies, fireworks, ice cream sundaes, immaculate bathrooms, and small toy trucks that were loosed in wooded backyards with streams and glens.”.  It’s different, not better.  Bullies will be and we all “live down here with us, down here in the world.”  Freedom and equality mean strife and struggle.  Revolution has no color except blood.

Nipsey Russell

Tonightly the topic is Sandra Bland.  The panel is Christina Greer, Jordan Carlos, and Mark deMayo.

The real news below.

The Daily/Nightly Show (Sinister)

The whole show. You can watch it if you can stand it.  Here are the standard links (1, 2, 3) and the web exclusive extended (1, 2).  At least it’s out of the way and we can concentrate on what makes Jon good and not on what makes him suck.

This week’s guests-

Jake Gyllenhaal will be on to talk about Southpaw, a kind of grittier Rocky (Adrian dies).

The Whitely Show

Tonightly our special guest is Felonious Munk talking about #BlackLives vs. #AllLives.  The panel is Lavell Crawford, Gary Owen (not the one you are thinking of), and Uzo Aduba.

The real news below.

The Daily/Nightly Show (The Big Get)

You can watch it if you can stand it.  My position is that at least it’s out of the way and we can concentrate on what makes Jon good and not on what makes him suck.  My activist brother was worried that it will be just another one of these love fests where Jon decides not to burn his Rolodex by asking only softball questions, big and fat and right over the heart of the plate (oh, and he’s bi-partisany about it too, anyone remember John McCain?).

My brother was exactly right.

Obama on The Daily Show: ‘Executive order: Jon Stewart cannot leave’

by Rory Carroll, The Guardian

Tuesday 21 July 2015 19.54 EDT

With Obama approaching his final year in the White House and Stewart nearing the end of his 16-year-run as host of the Comedy Central flagship, the encounter had a valedictory air.

The Iran nuclear deal, as expected, featured prominently. Obama joked that critics of the deal seemed to think that “if you had brought Dick Cheney to the negotiations everything would be fine”.

Stewart noted his guest’s recent run of victories: “It appears that you’re feeling it a little bit right now. Do you feel like seven years in ≥”

“I know what I’m doing,” Obama interrupted. “A lot of the work that we did early starts bearing fruit late. The way I’m feeling right now is, I’ve got 18 months.” He vowed to tackle climate change and fuel-efficiency standards before leaving power.



Obama said he felt strongly that “stuff gets better if we work at it and we stay focused on where we are going”. He said the “Hope” posters from his 2008 election run gave some the impression that everything would be fixed right away.

“We didn’t make those. You made those,” Stewart noted.

The president conceded many goals will remain unmet when he leaves office in 2017. “You’re always going to fall short, because if you’re hitting your marks, that means you didn’t set them high enough. We don’t score a touchdown every time, but we move the ball forward.”

Hmm… what would Dr. King have to say about that?

As the weeks and months went by, we realized that we were the victims of a broken promise. A few signs, briefly removed, returned; the others remained.

As in so many past experiences, our hopes had been blasted, and the shadow of deep disappointment settled upon us. We had no alternative except to prepare for direct action, whereby we would present our very bodies as a means of laying our case before the conscience of the local and the national community.



Oppressed people cannot remain oppressed forever. The yearning for freedom eventually manifests itself, and that is what has happened to the American Negro. Something within has reminded him of his birthright of freedom, and something without has reminded him that it can be gained. Consciously or unconsciously, he has been caught up by the Zeitgeist, and with his black brothers of Africa and his brown and yellow brothers of Asia, South America and the Caribbean, the United States Negro is moving with a sense of great urgency toward the promised land of racial justice. If one recognizes this vital urge that has engulfed the Negro community, one should readily understand why public demonstrations are taking place. The Negro has many pent-up resentments and latent frustrations, and he must release them. So let him march; let him make prayer pilgrimages to the city hall; let him go on freedom rides–and try to understand why he must do so. If his repressed emotions are not released in nonviolent ways, they will seek expression through violence; this is not a threat but a fact of history.



I feel impelled to mention one other point in your statement that has troubled me profoundly. You warmly commended the Birmingham police force for keeping “order” and “preventing violence.” I doubt that you would have so warmly commended the police force if you had seen its dogs sinking their teeth into unarmed, nonviolent Negroes. I doubt that you would so quickly commend the policemen if you were to observe their ugly and inhumane treatment of Negroes here in the city jail; if you were to watch them push and curse old Negro women and young Negro girls; if you were to see them slap and kick old Negro men and young boys; if you were to observe them, as they did on two occasions, refuse to give us food because we wanted to sing our grace together. I cannot join you in your praise of the Birmingham police department.

In a democratic system our representatives are not without agency and power, to pretend otherwise is a lie.

And the Party Platform?  A broken promise.

It’s not about the morality of the victim, it’s about the motivation of the rapist and consent

Tonightly we’ll be talking about the Ashley Madison hack and, of course, the Cos.  Our panel will be 50 Cent, Judd Apatow, and Rachel Feinstein.

Discontinuity

Not just a step, a giant leap for ass kind

This week’s guests-

Paul Rudd’s web exclusive extended interview and the real news below.

The Daily/Nightly Show (Semi-Penultimate)

It’s a real word, it means third to last.

I suppose I ought to be writing brilliant little essays about Jon and what he’s meant to me personally and my career (such as it is) as a blogger, but that’s too hard and I’m too tired and besides- I’m already maximally depressed by the prospect and I understand the great hidden mystery of continuity.

It was just a matter of knowing the secret of all television: at the end of the episode, everything is back to normal.

And I like it.  Why do you think I’m in therapy?  You know how long February 2nd lasts?  Thirty four years.

Bree Newsome

What makes you think we’re not going to talk about Cos tonightly?  The panel is Kerry Coddett, Sunny Hostin, and Mike Yard.

Discontinuity

First they came for our team names, and I said nothing

This week’s guests-

Paul Rudd will be on to talk about Ant Man which I’m given to understand is modest and quirky for a Marvel movie, though I wouldn’t feel compelled to fork out $14 just so I could set up Captain America: Civil War.

The real news (Donald Trump) below.

The Daily/Nightly Show (Tearful Retrospective)

Soul Daddy

Tonightly, Bree Newsome, remover of the Battle Flag of the Army of Northern Virginia from the South Carolina Confederacy display.  Should be fun.  The panel will be Holly Walker, Rory Albanese, Mike Yard, and Ricky Valez.

Continuity

17, 18, …

Next week repeats.  Week after that pre-empted.  Regular shows resume July 20th which leaves scant time before Jon’s departure.

Not quite sure what I’m going to do, maybe I’ll follow Shark Week (just kidding).

Sarah Vowell is actually the Senior Historical Context Correspondent for The Daily Show, so she’s no doubt on to announce she’s starting a new project and won’t be appearing anymore followed by a tearful retrospective as we wonder just exactly what Trevor Noah will have left to work with when he takes over.

On the other hand she may just want to talk about reprising her role as Violet in Incredibles 2 (in production for 2016 release).

In other news Amy Schumer confirms she had serious discussions with Jon about hosting, but decided that the workload was too onerous and the role not well suited for the direction she wants to take her art.

Sigh.

Kirsten Gillibrand’s 2 part web exclusive extended interview and the real news below.

The Daily/Nightly Show (Eh? I’m a little deaf in my Right ear)

Handsome Ape Update

If there is Facebook in the afterlife, you are in hell.

Tonightly we will be talking about Church burnings.  Remember, because this is a war against the Christian faith in general, the fact that the congregations of these Churches is overwhelmingly African American has no relevance whatsoever.

Right.

The panel is Jim Gaffigan, Cenk Uygur, and Kerry Coddett.

Continuity

Mad as a Hatter

This week’s guests-

You have every reason to mistrust Kirsten Gillibrand.  Her donations from pro-TPP groups was second only to – wait for it – Mitch McConnell.  He got $8.2 million, she got $6.2 million.

Despite that she voted against TPA, so… points for her I guess.

She’ll be on to promote her new ghostwritten by her writer and Hillary Clinton’s writer book- Off the Sidelines: Speak Up, Be Fearless, and Change Your World

The real news below.

The Daily/Nightly Show (Be Open to This)

Haterade

Tonightly who knows?  We may be stuck on the Rainbow Ruling or we could talk about the fat petty dictator of New Jersey.  Our panelists are Alona Minkovski, Chris DiStefano, and Boy George.

Continuity

Today is some of the darkest 24 hours in our nation’s history

This week’s guests-

I was about to say that Jon Hamm was just another unemployed SAG member like Jon (Stewart) but as it turns out he does some voiceover work in Minions.

The real news below.

The Daily/Nightly Show (I’m not interested in their opinion)

Something that’s been clear for a very long time now

Tonightly It’s Big Gay Monday with the New York City Gay Chorus-

Our panelists are Janet Mock, Jordan Carlos, and Guy Branum.

Continuity

Religion and Science are not contradictory

This week’s guests-

Taylor Schilling is best known for her work in Orange is the New Black, but if you’re not a Netflix subscriber you’ve never seen it.  Do not forget however that she was also Dagny Taggart in Atlas Shrugged: Part I.

Richard Lewis’s web exclusive extended interview and the real news below.

The Daily/Nightly Show (The Show from Hell)

Cray

Tonightly Robin Thede will be on to reveal a new White House strategy.  Our panel will be Horatio Sanz, Reza Aslan, and Mike Yard.

Continuity

Jessica Williams

Next week’s guests-

Richard Lewis is on to talk about his new book, Reflections From Hell: Richard Lewis’ Guide on How Not to Live.

The real news below.

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