Tag: Prime Time

Your last chance to vote against Bristol.  Mostly premiers.

To begin with, this case should never have come to trial. The state has not produced one iota of medical evidence that the crime Tom Robinson is charged with ever took place… It has relied instead upon the testimony of two witnesses, whose evidence has not only been called into serious question on cross-examination, but has been flatly contradicted by the defendant. Now, there is circumstantial evidence to indicate that Mayella Ewel was beaten – savagely, by someone who led exclusively with his left. And Tom Robinson now sits before you having taken the oath with the only good hand he possesses… his RIGHT. I have nothing but pity in my heart for the chief witness for the State. She is the victim of cruel poverty and ignorance. But my pity does not extend so far as to her putting a man’s life at stake, which she has done in an effort to get rid of her own guilt. Now I say “guilt,” gentlemen, because it was guilt that motivated her. She’s committed no crime – she has merely broken a rigid and time-honored code of our society, a code so severe that whoever breaks it is hounded from our midst as unfit to live with. She must destroy the evidence of her offense. But what was the evidence of her offense? Tom Robinson, a human being. She must put Tom Robinson away from her. Tom Robinson was to her a daily reminder of what she did. Now, what did she do? She tempted a Negro. She was white, and she tempted a Negro. She did something that, in our society, is unspeakable. She kissed a black man. Not an old uncle, but a strong, young Negro man. No code mattered to her before she broke it, but it came crashing down on her afterwards. The witnesses for the State, with the exception of the sheriff of Maycomb County have presented themselves to you gentlemen, to this court in the cynical confidence that their testimony would not be doubted, confident that you gentlemen would go along with them on the assumption… the evil assumption that all Negroes lie, all Negroes are basically immoral beings, all Negro men are not to be trusted around our women. An assumption that one associates with minds of their caliber, and which is, in itself, gentlemen, a lie, which I do not need to point out to you. And so, a quiet, humble, respectable Negro, who has had the unmitigated TEMERITY to feel sorry for a white woman, has had to put his word against TWO white people’s! The defendant is not guilty – but somebody in this courtroom is. Now, gentlemen, in this country, our courts are the great levelers. In our courts, all men are created equal. I’m no idealist to believe firmly in the integrity of our courts and of our jury system – that’s no ideal to me. That is a living, working reality! Now I am confident that you gentlemen will review, without passion, the evidence that you have heard, come to a decision and restore this man to his family. In the name of GOD, do your duty. In the name of God, believe… Tom Robinson.

• ABC Family– Aladdin
• Disney– Ratatouille
• Discovery– Dirty Jobs, Auction Kings (premiers)
• ESPN– College Hoopies
• ESPN 2– College Throwball, Temple @ Miami (Ohio), AND Hoopies
• FX– What Happens in Vegas
• Sci Fi– Stargate Universe (premier)
• Speed– Monster Jam
• TBS– Family Guy, Glory Daze (premier)
• Turner Classic– Atticus Finch, Boys Town
• TNT– The Bucket List
• Toon– The School of Rock, Tower Prep (premier)
• Vs.– Point Break

Later-

• AMC– Inside Man
• Food– Private Chefs of Beverly Hills (premier)
• Sci Fi– Stargate Universe (Instapeat), The Curse of King Tut’s Tomb
• Turner Classic– Sounder
• USA– Psych, Burn Notice (this week’s)

Dave hosts Jerry Seinfeld and Colin Firth.  Jon and Stephen in repeats, 11/17 and 11/9.  Conan hosts Christina Applegate, Patton Oswalt, and Maroon5.

Boondocks– The Invasion of the Katrinas

The 11 Commandments–

1. Inertia shall prevail.
2. Nothing is sacred.
3. Hate thy neighbor.
4. No good ever comes from helping one’s fellow man.
5. Worship a higher power.
6. Look to the past for inspiration.
7. Death be not bad.
8. Work hard at not working.
9. No reason is too trivial for ending a relationship.
10. A short, stocky, slow-witted, bald man can be a chick magnet.
11. The craziest person is the sanest of all.

Well, you can watch Bristol Palin.  Other Premiers.  American Masters, Lennon NYC.

Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who’ve ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don’t need. We’re the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War’s a spiritual war… our Great Depression is our lives. We’ve all been raised on television to believe that one day we’d all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won’t. And we’re slowly learning that fact. And we’re very, very pissed off.

• ABC Family– A Carol Christmas, Holiday in Handcuffs
• AMC– Troy (Joey?)
• Bravo– Real Housewives marathon
• Discovery– Brew Masters (Series Premier repeat), Sr. v. Jr. x 2
• E!– Bruce Almighty
• ESPN– Throwball, Broncos @ Chargers
• ESPN2– College Hoopies, Duke v. Marquette, Gonzaga v. Kansas State
• Food– The Best Thing I Ever Ate (premier)
• FX– The Devil Wears Prada
• History– Basically Pawn Stars
• Lifetime– Fab Five: The Texas Cheerleader Scandal
• Oxygen– Kiss the Girls x 2
• Sci Fi– Fight Club
• Spike– National Security
• TBS– Family Guy night
• Turner Classic– Footlight Parade
• TLC– Cakes (premiers)
• Toon– Adventure Time with Finn & Jake, Regular Show, MAD, Robotomy (premiers)
• Vs.– Bruins @ Lightning

Later-

• AMC– A Few Good Men
• ESPN– College Hoopies, Virginia v. Washington
• FX– Mr. 3000 (better than it reads)
• Spike– Bad Santa
• Turner Classic– The Public Enemy, Little Caesar
• TNT– Glory Daze (Series Premier repeat)
• USA– Street Kings x 2

Dave hosts Natalie Portman and Jay Pharoah.  Jon and Stephen are in repeats, 10/27 and 11/10.  Alton has Π, Pumpkin and Apple.  Conan hosts Zachary Levi and Christina Aguilera.

Boondocks– The Story of Catcher Freeman

A new car built by my company leaves somewhere traveling at 60 mph. The rear differential locks up. The car crashes and burns with everyone trapped inside. Now, should we initiate a recall? Take the number of vehicles in the field, A, multiply by the probable rate of failure, B, multiply by the average out-of-court settlement, C. A times B times C equals X. If X is less than the cost of a recall, we don’t do one.

Amazing Race.  Giants @ Eagles (I undestand my local team is in a sporting contest).  New Simpsons, Cleveland, Family Guy, American Dad.  More premiers.  Awards (ugh).

71 – 51 over Georgia Tech.  81 and counting.

• ABC Family– Holiday in Handcuffs, Snowglobe
• AMC– From Dusk Till Dawn, The Walking Dead (last week’s and new x 3)
• Bravo– Real Housewives marathon (with premier)
• Comedy– Futurama marathon (including Holiday premier!)
• Disney– Good Luck Charlie, Shake it Up!, Sonny With a Chance (premiers)
• Discovery– Dirty Jobs x 2 (premiers), Brew Masters (Series Premier)
• Food– Next (penultimate and Season Finale), Iron Chef America (premier)
• History– Ice Road Truckers, Top Gear (premiers)
• Lifetime– The Devil’s Teardrop, One Angry Juror (again)
• National Geographic– Great Migrations marathon
• Sci Fi– The Grudge 3, Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers
• TBS– Shrek, Shrek 2
• TLC– Sarah Palin’s Alaska
• Turner Classic– Room for One More, Every Girl Should Be Married (Cary Grant night)
• TNT– The Bucket List x 2
• Toon– Clone Wars x 2, Sym-Bionic Titan (this week’s)
• Vs.– Point Break x 2

Later-

• FX– Vantage Point
• Lifetime– Sleeping With the Enemy
• Sci Fi– House of the Dead 2, The Butterfly Effect 3: Revelations
• TBS– The School of Rock, Men in Black
• Turner Classic– The Viking (the first feature-length film that featured a soundtrack, also the first time a feature used the Technicolor process)
• TV Guide– Weeds marathon (useless)
• USA– The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian

Fourth Season Finale of The Venture Brothers, 1 hour special Operation P.R.O.M.

This season’s summaries-

• Blood of the Father, Heart of Steel
• Handsome Ransom
• Perchance to Dean
• Return to Malice
• The Revenge Society
• Self-Medication
• The Better Man
• Pinstripes & Poltergeists

• The Diving Bell Vs. The Butter-Glider
• Pomp & Circuitry
• Every Which Way But Zeus
• Everybody Comes to Hank’s
• Bright Lights, Dean City
• Assisted Suicide
• The Silent Partners
• Operation: P.R.O.M.

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Not enough College Throwball for your eyes?  Florida State @ Maryland or Nebraska @ Texas A&M or USC @ Oregon State.  Oh, and Army @ Notre Dame.  John Legend fans will want to watch Austin City Limits.

Why is the rum always gone?

Oh… that’s why.

• ABC Family– Ratatouille x 2
• AMC– Open Range x 2
• Bravo– House marathon
• Comedy– Superhero Movie
• Disney– Tinker Bell and the Great Fairy Rescue
• Discovery– Wreck Chasers marathon
• E!– Coyote Ugly
• ESPN– College Throwball, Arkansas @ Mississippi State
• ESPN2– College Throwball, Oklahoma @ Baylor
• Food– Thanksgiving
• FX– What Happens in Vegas
• History– Swamp People marathon
• Lifetime– Reviving Ophelia, One Angry Juror
• Oxygen– Titanic
• Sci Fi– Impact
• TBS– Shrek 2, Meet the Fockers
• Turner Classic– San Francisco, Up the River (Spencer Tracy night)
• TNT– What Women Want, The Holiday
• Toon– Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008 film)
• USA– The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian
• Vs.– College Hoopies Wisconsin @ UNLV
• MTV– The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning

Later-

• Oxygen– The Perfect Man
• Sci Fi– Post Impact, Earthstorm
• TBS– Glory Daze (Series Premier repeat)
• Turner Classic– Plymouth Adventure (more Spencer)
• TNT– City of Angels
• True– Glory Daze (Series Premier repeat)
• USA– Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest

SNL- Anne Hathaway and Florence and the Machine.  GitS: SAC 2nd Gig, Natural Enemy, Inductance (Episodes 4 & 5).

Gentlemen… what do keys do?

Keys unlock… things?

And whatever this key unlocks, inside there’s something valuable. So we’re setting out to find whatever this key unlocks!

No. If we don’t have the key, we can’t open whatever it is we don’t have that it unlocks. So what purpose would be served in finding whatever need be unlocked, which we don’t have, without first having found the key what unlocks it?

So we’re going after this key!

You’re not making any sense at all.

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Premiers!  Good for you.

Keith called out Jon Stewart last night on false equivalency-

Take the poll and tell Keith to bring back ‘Worst’ just the way it was (73% at the moment).

In other news- Joe “Dead Intern” Scarborough suspended!

• AMC– Jeepers Creepers x 2, The Walking Dead (this week’s)
• Bravo– A Knight’s Tale
• Discovery– Swamp Loggers (last week’s and new)
• ESPN– Hoopies, Thunder @ Celtics, Bulls @ Mavericks
• ESPN2– College Hoopies, Pittsburgh v. Texas, College Throwball, Fresno @ Boise
• Food– Outrageous (premier)
• FX– Lara Croft: Tomb Raider, My Super Ex-Girlfriend
• National Geographic– Dog Whisperer (premier)
• Nick– iCarly, Big Time Rush (premiers)
• Sci Fi– Sanctuary (premier)
• Speed– Turn Left Trucks Ford 200
• Style– Doc Hollywood
• TBS– Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (with Boris Karloff!), Shrek, Dr. Seuss’ The Cat in the Hat
• Turner Classics– The Last Wave, Gallipoli
• TNT– The Bucket List
• Toon– Sym-Bionic Titan, Generator Rex, Clone Wars (premiers)
• True– Conspiracy Theory With Jesse Ventura marathon (with premier)
• USA– National Treasure
• MTV– Dawn of the Dead x 2

Later-

• Bravo– The Legend of Zorro
• Oxygen– The Wedding Planner, Just Friends
• Sci Fi– Stargate Universe (this week’s), Sanctuary (Instapeat)
• Speed– Formula 1 Debrief (premier)
• TBS- Glory Daze (Series Premier repeat), Dead Man on Campus
• Turner Classic– Picnic at Hanging Rock
• TNT– Tombstone
• Toon– Childrens Hospital (Season Finale repeat)
• USA– The Golden Compass

Dave hosts Billy Bob Thornton, Mike E. Winfield, and the Secret Sisters (get a wiki page guys).

What your telling me Sir and correct me if I’m wrong, is that the infantry attack on Lone Pine, and our Light Horse attack on the Nek are diversions.

Oh, not just diversions Major, vital important diversions. Tonight, 25,000 British troops will land here at Suvla Bay. Our attacks are to draw the Turks down on us so the British can get ashore. Sorry I didn’t tell you this before, secrecy is vital.

But Sir, the Nek is a fortress. Protected by at least five machine guns at point-blank range.

Yeah, we’ve considered that Barton. We’re gonna hit their trenches with the heaviest barrage of the campaign just before your men go over the top.

By the time we’ve finished here, there won’t be a Turk within miles.

The Turks can keep us pinned down at ANZAC forever. This new British landing is our only hope. We must do what we can to make it succeed. Because of it does succeed, we’ll have Constantinople with a week, and knock Turkey out of the war.

A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving.  Mostly premiers.

We don’t have none of this stuff in the boy’s room! Wait a minute! We don’t got none of this… we don’t got doors on the stalls in the boy’s room, we don’t have, what is this? What’s this? We don’t have a candy machine in the boy’s room!

• ABC Family– Mean Girls, Cheaper by the Dozen (while it does have Steve Martin, not the good 1950 version)
• AMC– Hidalgo x 2
• Bravo– Real Housewives marathon (with premier)
• Disney– Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (Depp, not Wilder)
• ESPN– College Throwball, UCLA @ Washington
• ESPN2– College Hoopies, Maryland v. Pittsburgh, Illinois v. Texas
• Food– Feuds (premier)
• FX– It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, The League x 3 (premiers)
• History– Aliens! (with premier)
• Lifetime– Her Sister’s Keeper
• National Geographic– Naked Science (premier)
• Turner Classic– The Naked Maja, On the Beach (Ava Gardner night)
• TNT– Hoopies, Suns @ Magic, Nuggets @ Trail Blazers
• Travel– Man v. Food marathon (thank goodness)
• USA– Burn Notice (premier)

Later-

• AMC– Wild Wild West
• Disney– Phineas and Ferb
• Style– Pretty in Pink
• Turner Classic– The Angel Wore Red (more Ava)
• USA– Psych (this week’s), Burn Notice (Instapeat)

Dave hosts Jim Carrey and Nicki Minaj.  Jon has Phillip K. Howard, Stephen Salvatore Giunta and Dick Wolf.  Conan hosts Jesse Eisenberg, Venus Williams, and The Decemberists.

Oh ho ho, I see. Now I’m the “master of this mechanical stuff.” As opposed to five minutes ago, when I was calmly and coolly trying to find a solution to this very problem. But then something happened. Someone, who will remain nameless…  JIM WEST! …decided to jump over the wire, thereby providing us with that exhilarating romp through the cornfield, and that death-defying leap into the abysmal muck! And here we stand, with that demented maniac hurtling towards our President, with our one and only means of transportation, with Rita as his prisoner, armed with God-knows-what machinery of mass destruction, with the simple intention of overthrowing our government and taking over the country!

Zap2it TV Listings, Yahoo TV Listings

Solid premiers.  Of them the most interesting to me are Secrets of the Dead Lost Ships of Rome and Circus, both on PBS.

Keith is bringing back ‘Worst Person In The World’.  I wonder what’s behind that?

I’m Burke. Carter Burke. I work for the company. But don’t let that fool you, I’m really an okay guy.

…

Look, this is an emotional moment for all of us, okay? I know that. But, let’s not make snap judgments, please. This is clearly-clearly an important species we’re dealing with and I don’t think that you or I, or anybody, has the right to arbitrarily exterminate them.

• AMC– Aliens x 2 (the best one)
• Bravo– Top Chef (Season Finale)
• Disney– Avalon High
• Discovery– Mythbusters (last week’s and new), Storm Chasers (premier)
• ESPN– Hoopies, Suns @ Heat, Bulls @ Spurs
• ESPN2– College Throwball, Bowling Green @ Toledo
• Food– Throwdown Thanksgiving Feast (premier)
• FX– Terriers x 3 (premier)
• History– The End Of The World! (as we know it)
• Lifetime– Sleeping with the Enemy
• Oxygen– Barbershop x 2
• Sci Fi– Hollywood Treasure x 2 (premiers)
• Turner Classic– The Kid, The Pilgrim (shhhhh, Charlie Chaplin night)
• TNT– You’ve been Gumped (again)
• Travel– Man v. Food marathon (with premier, thank goodness)
• USA– Psych (premier)
• Vs.– Bruins @ Rangers

Later-

• AMC– Alien 3 (not so good)
• Disney– Phineas and Ferb
• Turner Classic– One Week, Steamboat Bill, Jr., Safety Last (shhhhh)
• TV Guide– Fan boy coverage of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (premier, still useless, are you going to tell me Emma Watson kisses like an animal?)
• USA– Burn Notice (this week’s)

Dave hosts Jake Gyllenhaal, Fran Lebowitz, and Ne-Yo.  Jon has Jay-Z, Stephen Ian Frazier.  Conan hosts Susan Casey (you need a damn wiki entry), Russell Brand, and Kid Rock.

Boondocks– Ballin.

Those specimens, are worth millions to the bio-weapons corperation. If you’re smart, we can both come out of it as heroes and we’ll be set up for life.

You’re really crazy Burke, you know that. You really think that you can get a dangerous organism like that passed ICC quarantine?

How can they impound it if they don’t know about it?

They “will” know about it, Burke, from me. Like they’ll know that you are responsible for the deaths if 158 colonists here.

You’re wrong.

I just read the colony log. Dated 0-6-1-2-7-9 signed Burke Carter J. You sent them to that ship and you didn’t warn them. Why didn’t you warn them, Burke?

Okay. What if that ship didn’t even exist, huh didn’t you ever think about that? I didn’t know. I went in and made a major security issue out of it, and everybody steps in, and the Administraor steps in., and I made a decision and it was a bad call, Ripley, it was a bad call.

Bad call? These people are dead Burke! Don’t you have any idea what you have done here? I ‘m gonna make sure they nail you right to the wall for this, you’re not gonna sleaze your way out of this one. Right to the wall.

You know Ripley, I was hoping that you would be smarter than this.

I’m happy to disappoint you.

…

You know, Burke, I don’t know which species is worse. You don’t see them fucking each other over for a goddamn percentage.

Zap2it TV Listings, Yahoo TV Listings

Premiers.  Nova has Secrets of Stonehenge which could be interesting.

Time’s up! What do we have for the losers, judge? Well, for our defendants, it’s a life time at exotic Fort Leavenworth! And, for defense counsel Kaffee, that’s right, it’s a court martial! Yes, Johnny! After falsely accusing a highly decorated Marine officer of conspiracy and perjury, Lieutenant Kaffee will have a long and prosperous career teaching… typewriter maintenance at the Rocco Globbo School for Women! Thank you for playing “Should we or should we not listen to the advice of the galactically stupid!”

• ABC Family– Miss Congeniality
• AMC– A Few Good Men
• Disney– Sky High
• Discovery– Dirty Jobs (premier), Auction Kings x 2 (premiers)
• ESPN– College Hoopies, Butler @ Louisville, South Carolina @ Michigan State
• ESPN2– College Throwball, Ohio @ Temple
• Food– Private Chefs of Beverly Hills, Chopped (premiers)
• FX– The Italian Job (not the good 1969 version)
• History– Apocalypse PA. x 2 (Series Premier)
• National Geographic– Explorer, Lost Mummies of New Guinea (premier)
• Oxygen– Bad Girls Club (premier)
• Sci Fi– Stargate Universe (premier)
• Speed– Monster Jam (premier)
• TBS– Family Guy marathon, Glory Daze (Series Premier)
• Turner Classic– The Ghost and Mr. Chicken, The Apple Dumpling Gang (Don Knotts night)
• Toon– Son of the Mask, Tower Prep (premier)
• Vs.– Flyers @ Canadiens, College Hoopies, Arizona State @ New Mexico
• VH1– ATL

Later-

• AMC– The Sum of All Fears, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
• Disney– Phineas and Ferb
• ESPN2– College Hoopies, San Diego State @ Gonzaga
• Sci Fi– Stargate Universe (Instapeat), Merlin’s Apprentice
• Turner Classic– The Incredible Mr. Limpet {more Don)
• USA– Psych, Burn Notice (this week’s)

Dave hosts Jay-Z, Jamie Oliver, and Rihanna.  Jon has Bethany McLean and Joe Nocera, Stephen John Legend.  Conan hosts Harrison Ford, Rosario Dawson, and Reggie Watts.

Boondocks– Shinin’.

We joined the Marines because we wanted to live our lives by a certain code, and we found it in the Corps. Now you’re asking us to sign a piece of paper that says we have no honor. You’re asking us to say we’re not Marines. If a court decides that what we did was wrong, then I’ll accept whatever punishment they give. But I believe I was right sir, I believe I did my job, and I will not dishonor myself, my unit, or the Corps so I can go home in six months… Sir.

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Pretty much premiers.

I suppose I should say a word or 2 about Sarah Palin’s Alaska.  Yes I kinda sorta watched it in that face down on the keyboard in a puddle of drool sort of way which gives me nightmares about Stephen Colbert beating me with his Platinum membership card because I don’t buy enough Prescott Pharmaceuticals.

Sarah is absolutely right.  Yelling at Bears and their cubs while you’re stealing their fish is kind of begging Darwin to smite you Piper.  What was more interesting to me is that she didn’t wait 5 minutes to call out Joe McGinniss which sort of set the tone for her 40 minute campaign ad that plodded leadenly from talking point to talking point.

Mama Grizzlys indeed.

Now you may have a different impression and if not you have a chance to form a totally new one based on my particular prejudices tonight when it repeats, but when I say it lacks the drama and sincerity of Ochocinco: The Ultimate Catch I’m making a professional judgement as a critic.

Because I’m not a journalist, just a deadline writer.

• ABC Family– Freaky Friday (not the good 1976 version), Mean Girls
• AMC– The Abyss
• Bravo– Real Housewives marathon
• Comedy– American Pie
• Discovery– Sr. v. Jr marathon
• ESPN– Eagles @ Redskins
• Food– The Best Thing I Ever Ate, Triple D (premiers)
• FX– Anger Management, The Girl Next Door
• History– Pawn Stars, American Pickers
• Lifetime– Sins of the Mother, One Angry Juror
• TBS– Family Guy night
• Turner Classic– Sunrise (shhhhh)
• TLC– New Cake Boss
• Toon– Adventure Time with Finn & Jake, Regular Show, MAD, Robotomy (premiers), Total Drama World Tour (Season Finale premier)
• TV Land– Jerry Maguire
• Vs.– Blues @ Avalanche
• Oxygen– Catwoman x 2 (ugh)

Later-

• AMC– Deep Blue Sea
• Disney– Phineas and Ferb
• ESPN– College Hoopies, Miami @ Memphis
• Style– Sweet November (the Golden Rasberry version not the good 1968 one)
• Turner Classic– The Iron Horse (shhhhh)
• TLC– Sarah Palin’s Alaska (Season Premier repeat)
• USA– Bad Boys II x 2

Dave hosts Emma Watson (easily the brightest witch of her generation), Scott Caan, and Rascal Flatts.  Jon has Marion Jones, Stephen David Stern (Hoopies).  Alton does Fried Turkey and Stuffing.  Conan hosts LL Cool J, B.J. Novak, and Sharon Jones & the Dap Kings.

Boondocks– Attack of the Killer King-fu Wolf Bitch

Amazing Race premier.  New Simpsons, Cleveland Show, Family Guy, American Dad.  Throwball- Patriots @ Steelers.  Tina Fey accepts the Mark Twain Prize.  Everything else is just premiers.

This record here’s about twelve years old. Parliament buried it and it stayed buried until River here dug it up. This is what they were afraid she knew. And they were right to fear. There’s a universe of folk who’re gonna know it, too. Someone has to speak for these people.

Y’all got on this boat for different reasons, but y’all come to the same place. So now I’m asking more of you than I have before. Maybe all. Sure as I know anything, I know this – they will try again. Maybe on another world, maybe on this very ground swept clean. A year from now, ten? They’ll swing back to the belief that they can make people… better. And I do not hold to that. So no more runnin’. I aim to misbehave.

• ABC Family– Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
• AMC– The Walking Dead marathon (with premier)
• Bravo– Real Housewives marathon (with premier)
• Comedy– Wedding Crashers
• Disney– Good Luck Charlie, Shake It Up!, Sonny With a Chance (premiers)
• E!– Knocked Up
• Food– Challenge, Next (premiers)
• FX– There’s Something About Mary, What Happens in Vegas
• History– Ice Road Truckers (premier)
• Lifetime– No Reservations x 2 (without Anthony Bourdain), Waitress
• National Geographic– Great Migrations marathon (3 premiers)
• Sci Fi– Hollywood Treasure marathon
• TBS– Meet the Fockers x 2
• Turner Classic– Night Tide, The Big Country
• TLC– Sarah Palin’s Alaska (Series Premier?  You betcha!)
• TNT– Diary of a Mad Black Woman x 2
• Toon– Shrek
• Travel– Man v. Food marathon (thank goodness)

Later-

• ESPN2– World Series of Poker (2010 Final Table repeat)
• FX– Money Talks
• TBS– Road Trip
• Turner Classic– The Hoodlum (shhhhh)
• TNT– The General’s Daughter
• TV Guide– Weeds marathon (useless)
• USA– The Golden Compass, Serenity

Not just the Spanish Main, luv. The entire ocean. The entire world. Wherever we want to go, we’ll go. That’s what a ship is, you know. It’s not just a keel and a hull and a deck and sails, that’s what a ship needs but what a ship is… what the Black Pearl really is… is freedom.