Nov 25 2015

Dispatches From Hellpeckersville-Thankful

This is the first Thanksgiving since Mom died, and it feels very weird. For years Mom went away on this Holiday, and we had our dinner the Sunday before, but still, it was our get together and it’ll be sad this year. I’m guessing Christmas is going to have it’s moments too. But, the rest of us are still here together and dad seems to be doing okay, and for that I am thankful.

My kids are both healthy, and doing good in school. Neither of them are in trouble, they still get along with each other, aside from the ridiculous bickering that siblings engage in. In that way both of them are chips off of both of our old blocks–they do us absurdly proud in this area. Sometimes, when I’m at my very limit, I think, I know my mom is out there somewhere laughing her ass off at me getting a little bit of my own bullshit back, then I smile. Did I ever tell you all about the time my mom took me and my sister outlet shopping and we followed her around mock arguing in Monty Python accents? No? Well, we did. I think she perfected what I like to call the poached egg eye that day. So, I’m even thankful my kids don’t let me off easy.

Cleetus still has his health, and his job. It’s not enough hours, but it’s just enough pay to squeak by. It allows him to be here to see the kids off in the morning, as he has always done. He’s free to be at every parent teacher conference, to take me or the kids to appointments during the day, and to come home at night and play his guitar while I work on art, unwind a little. Second shift wasn’t what he was used to, but it’s working out okay for the moment, and I’m thankful as hell for that.

I’m thankful to Jon and Jen–my godson and his SO, who come to play cards with me every other weekend. Without that little break I might lose my sanity. It might not seem like much, but sending the kids upstairs to watch a movie and getting to cut loose for a couple of hours on a Saturday night means everything by the time it rolls around. We don’t go out, not to dinner or the movies, not to bars or anything like that anymore, so the card game is our social life. We have a hell of a good time, and I am thankful for it.

And finally, I am really thankful for my chosen family, here, and the positive inhalers, my online connection to the world. You people who have gotten me through this last year. I am thankful for you every damn day of my life.

2 pings

Comments have been disabled.