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Mar 27 2020

Cooties

What’s that German word for taking joy in the misery of others?

Schadenfreude?

This is what “Herd Immunity” gets you-

Boris Johnson and Matt Hancock in self-isolation with coronavirus
by Kate Proctor and Matthew Weaver, The Guardian
Fri 27 Mar 2020

Boris Johnson and the health secretary, Matt Hancock, have tested positive for coronavirus, they revealed on Friday, leaving them each to work in isolation on leading the government’s efforts to tackle the pandemic.

The prime minister, who is 55, will self-isolate for seven days in his flat above No 11 Downing Street after announcing that he had mild symptoms of a cough and temperature.

Johnson received the result at midnight, just hours after he was seen outside the door of No 10 clapping in support of NHS workers, alongside the chancellor, Rishi Sunak.

Hancock, who has responsibility for the NHS, said he would self-isolate until next Thursday.

Both men have been in repeated contact with senior political figures, including cabinet members, and advisers in the last few days. But despite the two men testing positive, no other ministers, nor the chief medical officer or chief scientific officer would be tested for the virus unless they showed symptoms, Downing Street said.

The prime minister’s official spokesman said on Friday: “The prime minister’s symptoms are mild and he is continuing to do all of the same functions he was performing before. The only difference is now he will have to do that by teleconferencing.”

Johnson chaired Friday morning’s Covid-19 meeting of government ministers and health experts. His regular audience with the Queen has been conducted by phone for at least two weeks.

Although the foreign secretary is officially the person who steps in to cover the prime minister’s role if he is incapacitated, there are no plans for Dominic Raab to stand in for Johnson.

Oh, “Herd Immunity”. It’s kind of the same concept as the Chickenpox/Coronavirus Parties here in the U.S., get sick now and you won’t get sick again.

Only this is not Chickenpox, it’s more like Smallpox.

Or Bubonic Plague-

“How do you know he’s a King?”

“He doesn’t have filth all over him.”

Oops.

Prince Charles Tests Positive for Coronavirus
By Mark Landler, The New York Times
March 25, 2020

Prince Charles, the eldest son of Queen Elizabeth II and the heir to the British throne, has contracted the coronavirus, Buckingham Palace said on Wednesday, adding that he had been suffering from mild symptoms since last weekend.

Medical advisers said that Charles was otherwise in good health and that they did not expect the virus to develop into a more serious illness, according to an official at the palace. But Charles, who is 71, met with the queen on March 12 — only a day before the advisers said it was possible that he became infectious with the virus.

The prince’s illness, and his potential exposure to the queen and other members of the royal family, rattled an already nervous Britain, which has seen the number of cases and deaths accelerate rapidly over the last few days, prompting b>Prime Minister Boris Johnson to put the country into a virtual lockdown.

Buckingham Palace said the queen, who turns 94 next month, “remains in good health.” She sequestered herself in Windsor Castle last week with her husband, Prince Philip, who is 98, saying that she and her family would follow the social distancing guidelines set out by the government.

I dunno, could be we’re actually down to Harry and Meghan, that would be embarrassing.

On the serious side, mild symptoms of Coronavirus are mild only in comparison with Death.

I probably have a ‘mild to moderate’ case of covid-19. I don’t think I could survive worse.
By David Von Drehle, Washington Post
March 24, 2020

The first symptom was fever. I figured I had the flu. No such luck. The mild to moderate symptoms of this coronavirus make garden-variety flu seem like a tea party. Rep. Mario Diaz-Balart (R-Fla.) described the relentless, soul-sapping fever as being hit by “a ton of bricks.” It’s funny: Thirty years ago, Mario was a hotshot young politician and I was a hotshot young reporter in Miami. I don’t think either one of us spent much time thinking about malaise. Now we are a couple of aging gentlemen flattened by a ton of bricks.

My image is more particular. Seven days into the waves of fever, I was drifting half in and half out of sleep. I was wearing a down jacket with the hood cinched around my head. I was buried under the covers, teeth chattering. A week like that is a very long time. (Nine days, and counting, is still longer.)

In my weird dream, I was on the high-winter prairie. I was on horseback. The ground was black mud, and where the animals stepped, the impressions of their shoes froze almost immediately. Meanwhile, a hard, freezing rain was falling, filling the ruts with ice water. I fell from the horse into the mud. The horse kept walking over me. I couldn’t stand up.

Those are my mild to moderate symptoms. And I’m thankful for them. Because I don’t have certain other symptoms — not yet. My headaches have been few. For many covid-19 sufferers, the headaches are excruciating. My lungs are working well, which means I don’t have to enter the hospital.

Good. I live in fear I should get a scratch that requires stitches. Sitting in a Waiting Room strikes me as volunteering to attend one of BoJo’s Coronavirus Parties to acquire my “Herd Immunity”.

Do I know someone with Coronavirus?

Well, speculatively. His test hasn’t come back yet but he was at a funeral with several other people who tested positive and right now he’s in ICU in a Medically Induced Coma.

And I don’t know him all that well, he’s someone who used to be my Boss at one of my gigs- haven’t seen him in years.

He appears to be recovering, they took him off the Ventilator.

But if you just can’t get enough irony in the Aristotilian sense-

Christian pastor who thought COVID-19 is just ‘mass hysteria’ among the first from Virginia to die from virus
By Sky Palma, Raw Story
March 26, 2020

One of the first deaths of a Virginian from coronavirus was a 66-year-old Christian “musical evangelist” who fell ill while on a trip to New Orleans with his wife. As the Friendly Atheist’s Bo Gardiner points out, Landon Spradlin had previously shared opinions that the pandemic was the result of “mass hysteria” from the media.

On March 13, Spradlin shared a misleading meme that compared coronavirus deaths to swine flu deaths and suggested the media is using the pandemic to hurt Trump. In the comments, Spradlin acknowledged that the outbreak is a “real issue,” but added that he believes “the media is pumping out fear and doing more harm than good”

“It will come and it will go,” he wrote.

That same day, he shared a post from another pastor that told the story of a missionary in South Africa who “protected” himself from the bubonic plague with the “Spirit of God.”

“As long as I walk in the light of that law [of the Spirit of life], no germ will attach itself to me,” read a quote from the post.

You have to understand that Fundamentalist Christians are Death Worshippers who want to get to that Big Rock Candy Mountain in the Sky and sit at the Right Hand of the Lord because their life here sucks.

I like to pretend I’m more optimistic than that.