Author's posts
Nov 06 2019
Oak Island- 2019
Ok, so Oak Island is back. Dan Blankenship is dead to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that. The register of his burial was signed by the clergyman, the clerk, the undertaker, and the chief mourner. Scrooge signed it: and Scrooge’s name was good upon ’Change, for anything he chose to put his …
Nov 05 2019
Vote!
I encourage you to do it, I don’t tell you who. Here in Stars Hollow it’s always hard. I hate to say it but Taylor Doose is a Democrat, Miss Patty Republican for reasons I won’t explain but involve several South American countries I’ve recently been re-admitted to. Stars Hollow itself has been Democratic since …
Nov 05 2019
String Theory
You know, I’m going for cute, adorable kitties here but in a nutshell- So let’s say you accept bosonic quanta have a supersymmetry (as Inigo says, “There is too much.” Just replace it with “Grandpa Blaine’s Old Ram” and get a sufficient drunk on and soon you’ll be reminiscing about Miss Wagner’s glass eye that …
Nov 05 2019
Cartnoon
Look- Texting and “The Internet” are not the same except for the underlying technology being digital. You can have one without the other. It’s like boats and farms, they both use water. Ask me about my Winnowing Fan because I’m tired of carrying it and want to build a Temple to Poseidon, God of Horses. …
Nov 04 2019
Profound Constitutional Questions
If a President lurches into, say Main Street USA straight out of Cinderella’s Castle in Orlando (because I certainly wouldn’t like to be accused of coastalism), grabs a baby (White baby, hate that it would make a difference) from a stroller, and tears out its heart and starts eating it, still vainly pumping, while the …
Nov 04 2019
Sean Spicer- Out Of Comptrol
Look, I never, ever watch Dancing With The Stars but really, REALLY? It’s not like he has a hidden talent for it, it must be the guilty pleasure at watching a penguin waddle out and knowing that at least now you won’t be the worst one. I mean seriously, is there like a Wormhole Singularity …
Nov 04 2019
Cartnoon
Barnum/Bunkum Bible-Beating Bastards Why can’t you be Ben Franklin White like me? I walk down Main St. in Bridgeport sometimes (it’s a very real place, ask any of the family at Ocean Sea Grill where you can eat the fish and not just sleep with them) and tell people it was once the site of …
Nov 03 2019
‘What Is Best In Life?’
Crush your enemies. Crush your enemies. And see them driven before you… Never work an act after kids or dogs. Unless you have Gracie dancing backward in high heels. See? I write fluently in 7 languages. Six of them are Computer. Look left. Look right. Look up. Only one of you will be graduating from …
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