Feb 04 2015

Dispatches From Hellpeckersville- Because Of Course

And I’m having a horrible flare. LOL! I can hardly move. It’s not like I didn’t smell this coming, because it’s been very stressful. I do what I can to alleviate it, but there’s only so much, you know? Thank the Deity Cleetus is here to help me or I don’t know what I’d do. I have been having more flares lately, worse ones. I don’t know, maybe it’s worse than flares. I know I need to see a new rheumatologist. I know that much.

Two nights ago around three am I was awakened by the sensation that I had been pulling weeds for 12 hours there day before and now was being forced to repeated the process only now with the muscles that ran from midway down my back all the way down the back of my legs screaming in protest. It’s like a cage of pain that surrounds my pelvis. I go to reach for my water to take a pill only to find a similar situation going on with my shoulders, they don’t want to cooperate at all. I can’t lay still, yet it’s painful to move. I get up.

I don’t have a doctor right now. I mean general practitioner. My doctor went back to teaching and the doctor I had as fallback guy just sent out notice that he’s going on extended leave. The practice is there, but I am not wild at all about anybody left. This is the practice that grew out of the doctor’s office I’ve been with since birth….shit. I’m very annoyed.

I cannot describe to you just how much this sucks. I’m disabled under the category of stuff that plenty of family doctors just don’t want to deal with. Or they want to start me over from scratch and no way in hell am I doing that. Trying to find a new doctor at this point will be a little slice of hell, and I know it. I need a manager to coordinate my care, not some inquisitor that I need to prove something to, been there, done that, bought the T shirt, use it for a dust rag.

I lucked out plenty when my second doctor left and my last doctor took over, she picked up my chart, looked it over, actually talked to me, and we went forward. I have not been impressed with anybody else at that practice. I read that they are taking on two new doctors, I am crossing my fingers that one of them will do. Why? Because it’s close.

I have to do something. I now have itchy patches on my feet with silvery scales…psoriatic arthritis? How the hell do I know, I’m not a doctor. I have google. That’s a dangerous thing. Nothings swells, though. I guess that’s good, but I can’t keep up this not being able to move shit.

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