FIFA World Cup 2011

Goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

ooooooooooooooooal!

You see, you have to make it long because you don’t hear it much.

It’s indicative of a flaw in my character that I’m uninterested in pitcher’s duels and Football.  Outside my jingoistic sports nationalism I doubt I’d be covering the event at all, not because I’m misogynous- I like womens’ Basketball better than mens’, but I also like scoring and there isn’t any.

Japan is the compelling underdog story.  Punching above their weight in a bid for redemption after a natural disaster (not quite sure how a trivial sporting victory does that, but I’m sure that just like underpants it leads to profit somehow).

On the other hand you have our bodice ripping titans striding Gulliver-like onto the field amid mindless chants of USA!  USA!

Sigh.  I told you I’m the wrong guy to convey the earth shattering importance of the occasion, I’m much better with the trivial and mundane.

Unlike some matches we are in fact guarenteed a victor if only by penalty kick shootout after 90 minutes of a scoreless tie.  Don’t laugh, that’s how we won over Brazil.

I do know enough to recognize that Japan plays ball control and the game itself is all about making the shot angle as acute as possible so the effective size of the goal is reduced.

Like Hockey except for the teeth on the ice.

So if you feel inclined to expose my ignorance of the nuances of the noble game feel free to do so below.

40 comments

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    • on 07/17/2011 at 20:56
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    • on 07/17/2011 at 20:58
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    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:02
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    Fascinating.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:04
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    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:07
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    Must be that clorophyl stuff.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:15
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    Not a good sign.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:16
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    Almost like they were normal people.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:31

    but they are very agile

    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:32
    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:33
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    Score?

    You’re kidding, right?

    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:36

    but I won’t be disappointed if the Japanese ladies win, after their annus horribilis

    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:48

    This does move very fast

    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:52
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    • on 07/17/2011 at 21:55
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    Grass still green.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:04

    An hour ago Mubarak was in a coma, now he’s awake. Maybe he was napping?

    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:07
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    We gotta have a goal, we just gotta.

    It’s Football Jake.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:09
    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:11

    the clock doesn’t stop, no time outs

    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:11
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    Goooooooooooooooooooooooal!

    A long time coming?  I’m not even clocking the half.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:17
    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:21
    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:25
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    Japan ties.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:34
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    And there was much rejoicing.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:38
    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:52
    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:52
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    USA!  USA!

    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:54
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    • on 07/17/2011 at 22:55
    • on 07/17/2011 at 23:02
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    not even any yellow cards.

    You’d think it was a non-contact sport.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 23:06
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    Fascinating.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 23:07

    This may well go to penalty kicks. 3 minutes left

    • on 07/17/2011 at 23:11

    Denial of goal scoring opportunity.

    • on 07/17/2011 at 23:12
    • on 07/17/2011 at 23:22

    Well played, ladies

    • on 07/17/2011 at 23:24
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    First ever in the Tournament.

    • on 07/18/2011 at 08:35

    I had meant to watch this game. Thanks for the cliffs-notes!

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